I keep her locked away, out of sight, in thedark. Where no one can see her, and no one can hurt her, but she can'treally live like this. She wants to feel the sun on her skin, and shareher smile and warmth and love with the world. She wants to make friends,and have people to talk to and play with. She just wants a normal life andI can't give it to her. The world is a sharp, cruel place with many teethand things that gnash and tear. The world will eat her alive, brutalizeher, destroy her. In here she is safe. Safe and locked away from the world- and from any chance of salvation.I tried ignoring her, letting her starve. I locked the door and ignoredher and tried to forget she was down there, to convince myself I hadimagined the whole thing. It didn't work. She's resilient, and can survivewith very little. And I couldn't forget, not completely. She was at theback of my thoughts constantly, at work, in my sleep. A dull pounding, myvery own telltale heart beating out the same three words. We went out for the evening (Friday), having a fine time. At the end of the night, we got back to the apartment - both tired from our "date." Judith suggested we retire, took me by the hand, and led me by the hand to her bedroom.Judith suggested a shower, and again led me by the hand into the stream of steaming water. She lathered my body, and I returned the favor. This was most stimulating, as we gazed into each other's eyes. We rinsed off, toweled each other off, and went to the bedroom. We pulled back the bedding and slipped between the sheets. Since this was all new to us, I didn't want to move too fast - even though it was evident she was very interested.While we lay next to each other, we maintained eye contact as we spoke. Communication is very important to me, and I find it to be not only an aphrodisiac - it is also excellent foreplay. We embraced, caressed, and spoke of what was so about our lives. This led to kissing, more caressing, and on it went. My experience enabled me.
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